I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
It's official. I'm a squirter. Wasn't a one time thing.
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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