I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
that's an acceptable place to lick
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Randomize
