we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
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