saw "Pah-jure" lube. Thought of you. Wearing the same clothes to work tomorrow.
I stayed in, ate a pint of Hagen daas and watched a movie about aids. Soooooooo single.
the pharmacist hit on me as i picked up my herpes medecine. i think we found a winner.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
gymnastic barn sex. fuck i wish i hadn't blacked out
I want to fling myself into the sun
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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