You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
All I know is it had something to do with a plunger and tuna salad. I'm done. I'm quitting my job.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Houston, we have a blender
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I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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