Hard rock hotel, wtf why am i still out, im gonna fuk 5 chix 2nite .maybe
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I'm inventing beer flavored vodka. This raspberry shit makes me feel like a pussy.
we marched down beaver avenue with lit tiki torches humming the olympics opening song.
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
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