your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
just woke up in my car, in front of the bar. Took me 10 minutes to find my keys which were about 10 yards away in a bush. According to my phone records, I called my ex 14 times last night. Breakfast?
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Hold on. At Sephora trying to decide what despair smells like.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
Dude, don't put me in a suit and feed me liquor; I'll never go home.
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
