I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I deserve to be covered in dicks
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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