Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
being pregnant is like rehab
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
Check the mailbox while you're out!
I already looked this morning. You go check and see what you won on Ebay after your day drinking spree.
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
He was peeing on the back wall of a building. He would have been okay if the building hadn't been a police station.
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