let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I just set a weed brownie on fire in the microwave.
Successful day.
please don't let me die tonight
what have you done for me lately?
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Currently doing the walk of shame out of some random girls house with my boyfriend. Talk about relationship goals.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Randomize
