I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
i really like this girl i slept with last night
you ask her out again?
yeah but she said she is busy next weekend getting married
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
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