so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
and she was petting her beer can
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize