And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
So because I'm off tomorrow that means your dick could be in my mouth majority of that time
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
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