i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
So... I woke up on a bench with a honey bun on my chest.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
Randomize
