Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
I banged her roommate when she was gone. She came back with a chicken sandwich and a bj. Then she said " smells like my roommates vagina" I think I can get a threesome tonight
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
