I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
He's saved in my phone as 'MURICA. I think it's safe to say I'm not exactly taking him seriously.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
that is very illegal...i love you.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
