After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got your flops too. But yeah you rolled off your raft a bunch of times so we had to ask the white trash squad to help you back on. You bit one of them
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
i feel as though me waking up and asking her if i went to the hospital was a sign that i was not okay
I would fuck him just for his dog
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
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