No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
like he couldn't stop by and throw me in the back seat and ask for a blowjob? he had to give me flowers?
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I will pray to the gods of eye bleach for you
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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