I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Someone's gotta tell him drunk sex comes before dating
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