i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Just gave a blow job while wearing a shirt that says 'world's coolest mom' idk how my conscience feels...
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Ok I've processed it. Who the fuck makes out drunk in a parking lot in a backseat with the windows down in the middle of the day?!?!
Yeah, I got home from work at like 9:30, and he was passed out on the couch wearing only a tee shirt and The Jurassic Park theme on repeat.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
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