Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
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