Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look at my fb. It says single. That's the gospel.
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used a thesaurus to write a sext...
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
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