I'm worried someone is gonna take a black light to my work computer. But the connection is faster here.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
