stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
Its great. Every time she starts barking i know ive got approximately 37 seconds to hide my gf in the closet and throw some clothes on
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
I still think he’s a fuckboy but he’s nice to me when I’m over.\nLike sets alarms for me in the morning and always makes sure I cum.
Randomize
