So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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