if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
