You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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