over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How hot? Like... how many hemsworths?
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
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