census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
Alive.
So much puke
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Randomize
