You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
The time to say "now you can't go and be strange about this at work" is not as you are penetrating your coworker. NOW its awkward
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
Randomize
