it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
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