Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..
just went trash diving in my work clothes for weed. A&E's intervention here i come.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
FIVE TIMES AND I HAVENT GOTTEN OFF ONCE
literally yelled NOOOO right before he finished .. yelled “five times and I still haven’t gotten off” when he was still inside me ..
Said “don’t worry I’ll get myself off tomorrow” to top it all off
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