I must be too annoying 4 u.
forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I wore my lizzie mcguire socks to the bar last night. Because that's how i get all the ladiez
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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