We won't sleep together?
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Inebriation Olympics: Team Drunk vs Team Stoned. This weekend. It's on.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
the woman that waxes my lady parts just hugged me...
were you wearing pants?
no.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
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