i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
the breathalyzer kept saying danger. we made our new slogan danger we need more shots
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
You don't have to have sex with both if us but I would like a little positive fucking regard.
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