i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
