i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
and this is why i am such an inspirational person, i am the Joel Osteen of alcoholics.
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
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Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
Im like a hedgehog. Easy to corner or get within reach, but tough to get right close to. Like a rooster with its feathers surgically replaced with razors
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad