I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
So here i am dipping ice cream in my vodka and watching the bad girls club on demand. This is not ok
I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
Noooo no no no no. She scares me. She means business. She wore a diaper when we went to the bar.
Randomize
