Texts From Last Night

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  (586): View more from Michigan

  Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom

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  (586): Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom http://tfl.nu/p7m9
  Replies (4) Good night (1413) Bad night (454)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"

  (1-703): View more from Virginia

  where do you find these guys?

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  (703): so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen" (1-703): where do you find these guys? http://tfl.nu/45ye
  Replies (8) Good night (1246) Bad night (3949)
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  (315): View more from New York

  I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse

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  (315): I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse http://tfl.nu/h4gb
  Replies (37) Good night (3188) Bad night (872)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip

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  (303): she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip http://tfl.nu/86nj
  Replies (20) Good night (4184) Bad night (938)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level

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  (256): that last vodka shot was definitely the straw that broke the camels alcohol tolerance level http://tfl.nu/kj4c
  Replies (16) Good night (4748) Bad night (847)
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank"

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins

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  (757): Seriously just heard: "we need some good ass wine. how bout this swa-vig-non blank" (201): hahahaha. Oh virginia: where the south begins http://tfl.nu/g5wh
  Replies (41) Good night (4462) Bad night (1308)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster

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  (303): and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster http://tfl.nu/9o1b
  Replies (14) Good night (988) Bad night (4071)
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  (619): View more from California

  Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.

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  (619): Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen. http://tfl.nu/rhei
  Replies (27) Good night (1462) Bad night (6406)
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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.

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  (203): I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole. http://tfl.nu/9iug
  Replies (17) Good night (1315) Bad night (3197)
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  (719): View more from Colorado

  Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.

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  (719): Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence. http://tfl.nu/tuvm
  Replies (15) Good night (4076) Bad night (996)
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  (204): View more from Manitoba

  I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.

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  (204): I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks. http://tfl.nu/ehmv
  Replies (6) Good night (2091) Bad night (702)
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  (812): View more from Indiana

  Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there

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  (812): Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there http://tfl.nu/jzmv
  Replies (3) Good night (1129) Bad night (632)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.

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  (724): All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems. http://tfl.nu/8zgr
  Replies (6) Good night (1576) Bad night (586)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"

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  (801): He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick" http://tfl.nu/sbhu
  Replies (6) Good night (384) Bad night (858)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know

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  (727): You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know http://tfl.nu/dtxn
  Replies (6) Good night (627) Bad night (244)

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