Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
As his dick went in he shouted GOAL at the top of his voice.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
and then you called me a third time and yelled that you were stealing a puppy named Willow
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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