turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver
Randomize
