Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
The best revenge is premature balding
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
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