The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
My aunt just said- "pizza is like sex. Even if it ain't good it ain't bad." Obviously she doesn't know us too well.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
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