it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize