You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
He's a Shit stain on my heart
My cab driver just suggested I brush my teeth because he can smell "the party" on me.
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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