hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
You had me at "you have a nicer rack then her"
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Dude it's unhealthy how much I love vagina in my face
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