I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
Randomize
