We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
i woke up on the couch at 5:24am, hangover, craving for some ribs, but i only had a bag of cheetos and a half empty beer. man what a breakfast.
I just got a text from a stranger offering to shave my asshole. I've been sober and out of town for a week, are you using my number as a dial-a-dumping again?
Randomize