remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I woke up this morning next to some guy. I was horrified, he woke up and said, "the white tiger strikes again!"
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
We had sex and he ended up in the hospital... don't know if I should be worried or proud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
He didn't even get to the first chorus of Hotel California before he started convulsing on top of me.
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize