His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Just fell off a train. Bad.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
I'm hiding her cosmo magazine. the only sex tip she needs is to not handcuff her boyfriend to her roommates bed and lose the key
Boobs speak an international language.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
My mom just walked in and saw a picture of his penis. She then asked me "Do you even have a cervix left?!" I don't know what to feel anymore HA
Yeah well that's a good thing right? Like mothers approval? Kinda like a Fathers blessing but. . . better?
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
the conference was great. we had to hide the acid in a planter in front of the department of agriculture though
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
