shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
"I want to just tie you up so you\'ll still be here like this when I get home." Actual words.
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
Please talk me out of ordering the stripper pole for a dollar. Please.
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
I've decided I'm peeing in a solo cup then throwing it on his windshield. It's official. He called the cops 4 times in our first week at the house. He deserves it, right?
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.