she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I convinced her last night that my actual nickname was "No Condom John"
right as i was about to introduce them she goes "old fuck buddy, meet new fuck buddy."
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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